107+ Funniest Bread Puns That Definitely Aren’t Crumby

  • 7 min read
  • Jul 31, 2021
107+ Funniest Bread Puns That Definitely Aren't Crumby

It doesn’t matter whether you are just a simple carb enthusiast, an amateur baker, or a seasoned chef – these bread puns are going to make you smile because they’re hilarious. The best thing about this list of bread puns, is that it’s never going to get stale.

Bread is a food that has survived a long history of human civilizations with maintaining its significance, partly because it is so widely accessible and provides good nutrition. According to a data in 2006, the global market of bread has grown to reach 122 million of tons, and then at 2011 it increased to 125 million of tons. Despite the economic fluctuation for years, and decades, and millennia, its market constantly grows.

Similar to how bread has many health benefits for you, so does the puns. Here are some of the puns’ benefits:

  • It gives comfort and soothes physical pains – Doctor often shares some humor to their patients in the treatment room whenever possible, because it can bring ease to patients and lessen their pain perception.
  • It reduces stress – Laughing from funny humor decreases hormone of stress, which called cortisol. Reduced cortisol level in human body can increase immunity system.
  • It improves your brain activity positively – Sharing humor in the form of jokes and puns can promotes memory retention.
  • It helps you to connect better with other – Humor is a powerful socializing tool. By sharing and hearing great jokes, you and your communicating partner can experience lifted mood and happier feeling instantly.
  • It helps you to get better understanding of yourself and others – Beyond the psychological, physical, and social benefits, humor has ability to connect you with your understanding of yourself and other, thus build better senses of compassion, empathy, and forgiveness.

Crumby bread puns are not exist, only the hilarious and funny ones! They are worth to be shared with your family or friends who love to eat bread. Read the following list that has puns to read again and again. They may make you crave for some bread, because let’s be honest, bread is delicious and it’s perfect to be eaten at any times.

Best Bread Puns That Are Hilarious

**_What’s the most sophisticated kind of bread? The upper crust.

**_What did the banker want from the baker? To pump her nickels.

**_Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband? He told her she was being too kneady.

**_Why was the chef surprised that anyone like her bread? She thought it was crumby.

**_What did one bread lover say to the other? Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.

**_What does bread say to a friend after doing them a favor? It’s the yeast I could do.

**_How does bread win over friends? “You can crust me.”

**_Why does bread looks so bad in photographs? It’s just too grainy.

**_How do you get a raise at the bread factory? Butter up your boss.

**_Why did the aging bread roll retire? Her career was already toast.

**_What’s the worst thing about a bread pun? It tends to get stale.

**_How do you make dog bread? Just use collie flour.

**_What did mama bread say to her kids? It’s way past your breadtime!

**_How does bread woo a lover? With lots of flours.

**_Why does bread hate hot weather? It just feels too toasty.

**_What do bread kids say during hide-and-seek? Bready or not, here I crumb!

**_What did the toast say to the psychic? You bread my mind!

**_Why was the bread actor so unhappy? She lost out on a juicy roll.

**_Why did the man keep punching his doughy friend? To get a rise out of him!

**_Why did the baker file a sexual harassment claim? People kept commenting on his hot buns.

**_Why was the loaf of bread upset? His plan were always going a rye.

**_What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend? You deserve butter.

Bread Puns to Share on Your Social Medias

It is hard to find someone who doesn’t love bread. Whether you use one to dip in your sauce, to make lunch sandwiches, or to feed cute ducks at local park pond, here are some laugh-inducing bread puns jokes, which are fresh baked just like how you like your bread.

**_Bready or not, here I crumb!

**_Gotta risk it for the biscuit.

**_Wheat it and weep.

**_You’re the apple of my rye.

**_That sour loaf kneads to be punished.

**_I’m on a roll.

**_Ciabatta stay away from me.

**_Did you know that pilgrims baked bread on the May-Flour?

**_Business at the bakery is on the rise.

**_Baking is a labor of loaf.

**_Don’t worry, you can crust me.

**_It’s a shame that bread puns are always so crumby.

**_The flour got in trouble, so his mama sent him to bread early.

**_Don’t be so sour, dough.

**_Stop loafing around!

**_I’m headed to mail a loaf of bread at the toast office.

**_I hear sourdough is on the rise.

**_Gosh, my sourdough starter is so kneady.

**_Next time you need a loaf, challah at me.

**_The two slices of bread decided to leave the bakery. I heard that they wanted to grow mold together.

**_You’re toast.

**_I don’t want naan of that.

**_Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.

**_I don’t know why, but whenever I take a photo of my loaf of bread, it comes out grain-y.

**_Why was the baker feeling anxious? Because he was in a loaf or death situation!

**_What do you call a rabbit who has spent too long in the sun? A hot cross bun-ny.

**_What kind of bread does Dr Who not like eating? Dalek bread.

**_What do you call sourdough that’s been baked by Shakespeare? Poet-rye.

**_Why did the roll go to the doctors? It was feeling really crumby.

**_What is the best way to get a rise in pay? Ask for more dough!

**_Heard the one about the loaf of bread who was sad? He had a break down and rye, then he felt much better.

**_I’d tell you the joke about some butter on a piece of bread – but you might spread it around.

Bread Jokes to Tell to Your Friends

The world of bread and baking possess infinite amount of potential to be wordplays. You can find or make puns easily from all of the bread varieties out there. If you need some of the best puns and jokes about bread, use the list in the following.

**_Why does bread hate Southern summers? The weather is too toasty.

**_What did the toast say to the psychic? You bread my mind!

**_My coworker asked if I liked toast. I told him it is my yeast favorite thing.

**_Did you hear about the bread factory burning down? They say the business is toast.

**_The bag of flour was so confused. He thought that he saw his friend the loaf yeasterday.

**_Bakers earn the majority of their income in the morning. They earn most of their dough at yeast by a leaven o’clock.

**_Toast is a lot like the sun. It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.

**_What do cops and simple artisan toast have in common? Not kneaded.

**_My doctor advised me against eating very burnt toast. I am black toast intolerant.

**_What do bread and baths have in common? Both can be improved with a toaster.

**_What did the slice of toast say to the person giving him too much flattery? Stop buttering me up!

**_Those two slices of bread knew they were toast when they saw the peanut butter and jelly show up for lunch.

**_What did the bread maker give his wife on Valentine’s Day? Flours.

**_Why did the aging bread roll retire? Her career was already toast.

**_What does Santa eat for breakfast? Mistle toast!

**_We will rise above these petty toast thieves.

**_Show him what you can dough.

**_No knead to get all angry.

**_They come from a long line of bakers. They are inbread.

**_What did one slice of bread say to the other slice when he saw some butter and jam on the table? We are toast!

**_When baking dog biscuits, be sure to use collie flour.

**_In my school-play, I was assigned to play a piece of toast. It was a great roll.

**_Why is dough used as another word for money? Because it is always kneaded.

**_Which tale do old loaves of bread tell the young dough balls? Moldylocks and the Three Bears.

**_What does the toast sing when it is learning the musical scales? Dough, Re, Mi, Fa…

**_I overate cookie dough and got sick. It was an overdoughse.

**_I know these answers are bad, but that’s only because I’m a weirdough.

**_What does a loaf of bread say to a friend after doing them a favor? It’s the yeast I could do.

**_What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend? You deserve butter.

**_What did mama bread say to her kids? It’s way past your breadtime!

**_Why did the aging loaf retire? His career was toast.

**_What did a slice of bread say after brushing his teeth? I’m bready for bed.

**_What’s the best thing about a bread joke? It never gets stale.

**_Why was the loaf of bread upset? His plans kept going a rye.

**_What’s the most sophisticated kind of bread? The upper crust.

**_How do you spot a radical baker? They’re always going against the grain.

**_What did one slice of bread say to the other before the race? You’re toast!

**_What did one slice of bread say to another after a long day? Don’t worry—tomorrow will be butter.

**_How does bread court his sweetheart? With lots of flours.

**_What did the bread say to the roll when they were playing hide and seek? Bready, or not here I crumb!

**_What do you say to a piece of toast that’s fallen face down on the floor? Butter luck next time.

**_Why do we call money dough? Because we all knead it.

**_What did the butter say to the bread? I’m on a roll.

**_What did the muffin say to the crumpet? You deserve butter than this.

**_What part of a slice of bread is the most sophisticated? The upper crust.

**_Why did the bread go to the doctor? Because it was feeling crumby.

**_What did the sliced bread say when it saw the butter and jam on the table? I’m toast.

**_What do elves make sandwiches with? Short-bread.

**_How do you say hello to German bread? Gluten tag.

**_How does bread relax after it’s finished baking? It loafs around.

**_How does bread remember things? It uses Toast-It notes.

**_Why did the ageing loaf of bread retire? Because his career was toast.

**_What do you call a slice of rye with ideas above its station? Upper crust.

**_Why doesn’t bread like warmer weather? Because it gets too toast-y.

**_What happens if a baguette forgets her umbrella? She’ll get soaking wheat all over.

**_What did the piece of toast say to the psychic? Wow, you really bread my mind.

**_Why do dough balls throw great parties? Because they always they rise to the occasion.

**_What did the slice of bread say to his girlfriend? I loaf you.

**_Why did the two slices of bread run away from the bakery? They wanted to grow mould together.

**_What did the bag of flour say when she bumped into the loaf of bread? Didn’t I see you yeast-erday?

**_Why was the baker in a bad mood? He woke up on the wrong side of the bread.

**_Why did the loaf of bread break up with his girlfriend? The relationship was crumbling.

Bread is a primary food in several countries in the world, and a popular food in nearly all of them. These funny bread puns are available to read and share wherever you live. They may inspire you to create your own puns, jokes, and one-liners.