125+ Best Horse Puns, Jokes and Sayings to Make You Say Hay Not Neigh

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Are you a sucker for puns? If that’s the case, you have come to the best website ever since this page compiled a selection of horse puns just for you. You will be neighing and whinnying while clutching your sides as you read these funny horse puns. Since these horse jokes are genuine barn-burners, these puns are guaranteed to become a mainstay in your own collection of hilarious bookmarks. Keep reading if you don’t believe it.

The horse is one of the magnificent creatures that, unlike any other animal, will make an incredible impact on you. On the other hand, horse-based puns may make you laugh so hard that you end up hoarse. So, make use of them one at a time and enjoy them together with your friends and family.

Most people comprehend puns, but only a few find it capable of making them laugh uncontrollably. According to a study about pun processing published in the journal Laterality in 2016, people who are able to grasp puns are capable of getting misunderstanding. Professor Tara McHugh and Lori Buchanan from the University of Windsor discovered that the interplay between the hemispheres of your brain is essential in determining whether or not the puns are underwhelming.

In short, being able to comprehend puns means you are an intelligent person. While some people might find these “dad jokes” are too bad to laugh at, some puns that are cleverly created may impress even the most experienced pun connoisseur. To produce your own horse puns, you will need a basic knowledge of how to create puns.

  • Understand the types of puns – Puns come in a variety of forms and shapes. So, understand each kind of these wordplays before crafting your own.
  • Enrich your vocabulary – You solely need to jot down some phrases and words you read or hear.
  • Open your rhyming dictionary – This dictionary can help you obtain some ideas, particularly if you have a particular target word that you’re attempting to turn into a pun.
  • Practice word assembles – It means you have to connect two words with similar meaning together, but these vocabularies don’t have to be connected in a logical manner.

Best Horse Puns

How do you calm down an impatient jockey? Tell him to hold his horses!

Why could the pony gallop really fast? It had a strong horsepower engine!

When does a horse talk? Whinney wants to!

What is a horse’s favorite TV show? Neighbors!

What is the difference between a horse and a duck? One goes quick and the other goes quack!

What do you give a horse with a sore throat? Cough stirrup!

What does a horse buy from a bakery? Thorough-bread!

What do you call a horse that’s been all around the world? A globe-trotter!

Why did the man stand behind the horse? He was hoping to get a kick out of it!

What do you call a horse with money in the bank? Financially stable!

Horse Jokes to Share with Your Fellow Equestrian

Horses are domestic, powerful animals. They are known to perform a variety of human tasks, including leisure and transportation. If you are an equestrian or working in the barn, there must be some times when your friends sharing some horse-related puns to make work less grievous.

What do horses eat? Fast food.

What type of horses only go out at night? Night-mares.

Why did the horse cross the road? Because somebody shouted hay!

Where do horses shop? Old Neigh-vy.

What type of computer does a horse like to eat? A Macintosh.

Why did the horse eat with its mouth open? Because it had bad stable manners.

Why do horses fart when they buck? Because they can’t achieve full horse power without gas.

What’s a horse’s favorite TV show? Neighbors.

How does a cowboy get a stallion to do odd jobs around the ranch? Pay him under the stable.

How long should a racehorse’s legs be? Long enough to reach the ground.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey.” The horse says, “You read my mind!”

What’s black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth? A mechanic.

What do you call a well-balanced horse? Stable.

What kind of bread does a horse eat? Thoroughbred.

What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds? A zebra.

What sickness do horses hate the most? Hay fever.

What do you call a noisy horse? A herd animal.

Did you hear about the horse with the negative attitude? She always said, “Neigh.”

Why are most horses in shape? Because they are on a stable diet.

How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday? His horse’s name was Friday!

Which side of a horse has more hair? The outside.

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman confuses idioms with jokes. So he offers him a glass of water, but can’t make him drink.

What’s the difference between a horse and the weather? One is reined up and the other rains down.

Why did the boy stand behind the horse? He thought he might get a kick out of it!

Where do horses go when they’re sick? The horsepital.

Why should you never be rude to a jump jockey? In case he takes offence.

What did the horse say when it fell? “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”

What did the mare tell her filly after dinner? “Don’t forget to clear the stable!”

Are you a horse? Answer yay or neigh.

You can now do the same thing with the help of the horse puns list you can find in this helpful article. They can also serve as your guide in crafting your own authentic horse punny jokes. Simply read and understand how the pun is formed, and you are all set.

Horse Puns to Make You Laugh

Horse Puns to Make You Laugh

The little train which was named ‘Pony’ could gallop really fast as it had a very powerful horsepower engine!

I saw my horse watching TV, so I asked him what was his favorite show. He replied, ‘The Neigh-bors’.

I was riding my horse whose ropes were painted with every color. I named it rein-bow.

If your horses get possessed by demons, only consult an ex-horse-ist!

My brother applied as an assistant stable caretaker. The farm really needs a co-pile-it!

If a horse is asked to cast his vote for the Senate of the horses, it usually had the option of a hay or a neigh!

The pony was a good journalist as he always brought news straight from the horse’s mouth!

One of the most difficult jobs is to talk with a racehorse. They hardly stand furlong!

Princess Elsa never really feared any horses. Probably because the colt never bothered her anyway.

The white horse decided to run away from his own wedding. He probably got colt feet!

Horses are extremely fond of playing indoor games. They usually spend their leisure time playing stable tennis!

The arrested horse was released by the police because it de-neigh-ed everything.

I had a half-horse friend who always had to be at the centaur of attention.

A horse in the jungle lost all his clothes and ran around to find some. Whenever the other horses saw him, they pointed at him and shouted, “Neigh-kid! neigh-kid!”

The horse, while climbing a mountain, fell down and said to his friend, “Help me please, I cannot giddyup”.

My horse woke up screaming and crying in the dead of night. She probably had a night-mare!

In the race, I bet my money on a Himalayan horse. I just had this feeling that it was a good horse Tibetan.

A Bronco went to a shop to buy a packet of juice, but the manager kicked him out because he just had one buck.

The arrogant horse was picked on by the other animals of the farm as they thought the horse would stirrup trouble any day.

Jockeys communicate with their horses by laying all their cards on the stable!

Horses love rock music, and they adore the band Queen. Their most favorite song is ‘Crazy Little Thing Colt Love’.

Horses that participate in races have special diets. They only eat fast foods!

During winter, my horse developed a sore throat. So, I gave him a cough stirrup!

Horses are extremely independent animals, and they can talk whinney wants to!

Before the much-anticipated race, my jockey was very anxious. So I told him not to be impatient and hold on to his horses!

I read a novel that had the story of a runaway horse. It was such a bad tale of ‘whoa’.

Our neighbor has a horse named Mayo, and well, Mayo neighs a lot.

The farm owner has a couple of horses and a huge sum of money in his bank. He is definitely financially stable!

I bought a horse at the spur of the moment. It was a bad decision, and now I am saddled with tons and tons of responsibilities!

When does a horse get depressed by the weather? When it reins.

Why did the horse get an award? It was out standing in its field.

Why did the foal go to the doctors? He was a little hoarse.

Why did the horses always miss the support acts at gigs? They are only interested in the mane attraction.

How did the horse with the speech impediment feel after corrective surgery went wrong? A bit filly.

Why don’t horses like being promoted? They hate being saddled with extra responsibility.

What did the mother horse say to the foal who stayed up too late? “It’s pasture bedtime!”

Why do horses queue up so badly? They’re always jockeying for position.

How do you greet the horse living next door? Howdy, neigh-bour.

What’s another term for a horse haircut? Mane-tenance.

What did the Italian horse say when he heard there was a speed between trot and gallop? I canter believe it!

A horse walked into a restaurant, and before he could order, the waiter said, “Hey”, so the horse replied, “Yes, please”.

Before an important race, the champion horse prefers eating bread. His favorite is the thoroughbred!

A horse that has a negative attitude in life can always be seen saying “Neigh”.

The man who owned the riding school was in dire straits as his business always kept falling down!

The newly married horses were looking for a place to stay. They finally went to a hotel and booked the bridle suit!

A lion decided to become a horse. So decided to name himself Stal-lion!

The only horse which will never lose a bet is Sherbet!

Horses are exceptional lawyers as they always capture the attention to de-tail!

I once got in a bit of trouble and decided to ask my horse for advice. My friend told me not to because horses are a couple of neigh sayers.

The fanciest horse which never takes part in a race is a clotheshorse!

We had a government-employed doctor in our area who was half horse and half man. He was from the centaur for disease control.

The horse owner was always seen standing behind his horse. To get a kick out of it should be the most appropriate reason.

My neighbor has a horse who always neighs loudly at night. She’s a night-mare to live with!

The stallion was an avid adventurer and has visited many places across the world. He surely is a globe-trotter!

The little pony didn’t win the singing competition as he was a little hoarse!

The only disease which most horses are scared of is Hay fever!

I saw my brother riding uncomfortably on a tall horse. I told him to get off his high horse!

My brother woke up late and was running late for work, so I told him to hoof it!

When the little horse stayed up late at night, his father shouted at him, “Little foal go to bed as it is pasture bedtime”.

A couple of horses decided to form a band called ‘The Foals’. They have quite a colt following!

Jockeys are often considered to be clouds as they hold the reins!

The bad horse didn’t want to answer any question that was asked to him, so he kept on stalling!

The only American Football team that every horse supports is the Denver Broncos.

My horse is extremely spontaneous as he always does things at the very spur of the moment!

The little horse was scolded by his teacher as he always kept foaling around the class!

The anthem for horses is ‘Watch me whip… watch me neigh neigh’.

Just before any thunder, horses see lightning colts!

My friend had a horse who was racing in the coming week. He named it ‘Radish’ and asked us to root for it!

A little horse borrowed some money from his big brother and couldn’t pay him back for quite a while. So, one day his brother became impatient and told him, “pony up!”

My horse is a bad dancer because, well, it has two left feet.

The teacher horse who specialized in teaching philosophy displayed a glass half-filled with water and asked his students, “Is the glass hood empty or hoof filled?”

The young horse was ambitious to join the top colleges of the country. He wanted to join the neigh-vy league!

After visiting the bathroom, the winged horse used the pegaflushes!

Horses usually carry their lunches to work wrapped in aluminum foal!

Horses only ever go to one place to cut and get their hair done. They all go to Maine.

Horses are avid readers of books by J.K. Rowling. Their favorite book is Harry Trotter and Hoofblood Prince.

The only cheese that can completely disguise a small horse is a mascarpone!

The horse was shown the red card and asked to leave the field while playing soccer as he would foal very often!

The amateur artist displayed a lot of horse paintings and drawings as he was eager to mount an exhibit!

In a race, a horse named ‘Black Beauty’ beat the odds to win the race. Guess she was indeed the dark horse!

The good horse has always maintained a good shape as he had a stable diet!

A horse won the horse racing competition at school and became quite popular overnight. He was the new stud of the school.

A horse was running towards a man at full speed because it heard the man shout ‘Hey’.

There was a joust, but the horse missed it as he had the knight off!

At a game of poker, the horse kept on losing but won the game in the last round. It was amazing how the stables turned in the end!

The horse stalls at the racetrack were labeled F, E, D, B, and A. I got confused, and when asked about it, they said it’s because no one had ever bet on a seahorse.

One should never insult any jockey. It’s because they always get angry and take of-fence.

Horses only ever have one hospital where they can go to have babies. It’s in Philly.

I finally scolded my horse a lot because it ate all of the bedding in its stable, and it was the last straw.

Horses are very bad at boxing as they just keep on hitting the hay!

My neighbor has a horse that has explosive pace. I guess we should name him Neigh-palm!

Ponies are wonderful hosts as they have amazing horse-pitality!

Just before the race, the young horse was extremely charged up as it ate a little bit of haywire!

The little mare got very sick, so he had to be admitted to the horse-pital!

I recently bought a painting from a farmer who only draws pictures of horses and cows. His name I heard is Oscar Moo-neigh.

The horse had no friends as he always bail-ed on everyone!

Working as an equestrian requires a lot of effort and patience. So, it’s pretty common for you to find yourself sick of the routine. Check out some horse puns names below and show them off to your fellow equestrians and see whether they will burst into laughter or roll their eyes at you.

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